Never Grow Up
by Nicconicco
Summary: Draco sit underneeth a tree by the Lake at Hogwarts with his guitar. Singing the song his mother sang to him when he was little, and thinking back on his life. Song-fic. 'Never Grow up' by Taylor Swift.


_**Disclaimer:** I Solemnly Swear I do not own Draco Malfoy, He belongs to JK Rowling, and JK Rowling only. _  
_I Solemnly Swear I do not own the song 'Never grow Up', It belongs to Taylor Swift. _  
_I Solemnly Swear, however, that I own the idea._

_**A/N:** This is my first Song-fic. And because it's my first, I'm rather happy about it. _  
_I am not really that girl who listen to Taylor Swift, I'm more of a, Skillet girl, and a Joshua Radin kind of girl. _  
_Well, I listen to all kinds of music, with the exception of techno, and girly girl music (like Lady Gaga and shi...stuff like that) etc. _  
_I do like Miss Swift's lyrics though. I can't tell you anything else, because then I would be lying._

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Never Grow Up**

_Your little hand's wrapped around my finger  
And it's so quiet in the world tonight  
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming  
So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light  
To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret  
I'd give all I have, honey  
If you could stay like that_

Draco sat under a tree, by the lake at the grounds of Hogwarts, with his guitar. He played on the song his mother used to sing to him when he was little. The song meant a lot to him, especially now when she's gone. It's been a week, the longest week in his life, but he still hadn't wept. The reason, everyone thought, was that he still didn't believe it. He still didn't believe his mother was gone from this world.

_Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little,  
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple,  
I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart,  
And no one will desert you,  
Just try to never grow up, never grow up._

The sun warmed his face as he sang quietly, thinking back on the time when she'd been present. She had always been so caring, so loving, despite what everyone thought. She cared for him dearly and wouldn't let anything happen to him if she could put a stop to it. She had begun to sing the song in her attempt to, well, keep him from growing up. _Growing up too fast_. She didn't want to see her son under the impression of the Dark Lord. She wanted him to have a better life than that.

_You're in the car on the way to the movies,  
And you're mortified your mom's dropping you off,  
At 14 there's just so much you can't do,  
And you can't wait to move out someday and call your own shots,  
But don't make her drop you off around the block,  
Remember that she's getting older too,  
And don't lose the way that you dance around in your pj's getting ready for school._

He smiled when he remembered how exited he'd been on the first day he was going to Hogwarts; he almost forgot to put his clothes on. His mother used to laugh wholeheartedly, and sometimes even dance with him when he decided to dance around ridiculously. His father would only sneer and leave the room, however, Draco didn't miss the twinkle of amusement in his eyes.

His father wasn't really like his mother, when his mother wanted him to be young forever, his father wanted him to grow up extra fast.

When Draco was little he was mummy's boy. When he grew older, his respect for his father grew much too fast for his mother's liking, and he suddenly became a little copy of his newfound role-model.

_Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little,  
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple,  
No one's ever burned you, nothing's ever left you scarred,  
And even though you want to, just try to never grow up._

Draco knew his mother always was scared for him, at Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, at his friends, even home. He though the main reason for her not wanting him to grow up was that she didn't want him to end up on the wrong side, whatever that was. She didn't want him to take the wrong paths too early; when he was still young enough not to be able to get out of the problems by himself. Of course that happened anyway, despite all of her 'serious-talk'.

_Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room,  
Memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home,  
Remember the footsteps, remember the words said,  
And all your little brother's favorite songs,  
I just realized everything I have is someday gonna be gone._

Of course, the lyrics didn't fit perfectly, for one, he didn't have a brother, especially not a younger one. He did, however, remember the sound of his father walking thought the front doors. You could always tell his mood in the way the door closed, or opened for that matter, for when he was mad the manor literally shook; his mother's cup of tea used to move, and Draco's things shook along with the house. Those days meant that it was time for Draco to slowly walk outside. Not that it was ever dangerous for him to be inside, but his father had this annoying habit of let everything out on Draco and his mother. They never got hurt, more than mentally, but with him screaming, Draco always tend to get scared. His father was very scary when he was mad and angry.

_So here I am in my new apartment,  
In a big city, they just dropped me off,  
It's so much colder that I thought it would be,  
So I tuck myself in and turn my night light on._

Draco got sad when he thought of his mother, of course. But it was not only because she's gone, it was also the fact that because of him, she had failed the only mission she had wished to succeed, namely bringing Draco up to be the way she wanted.

She would always be proud of him, she had said so herself before she left, but maybe not in the way he, himself, had hoped. She knew Draco like any mother new her child, mainly more than anyone else, and she knew Draco really is a good boy, deep inside. She knew he had a soft spot. The thing is; he didn't want to show that spot to anyone but her. Why? His father had taught him not to show weaknesses, it would tear him apart when the enemy turned it against him. He was her son, her only son, of course she was proud over him. And of course she loved him. He only wished he had told her the same while she was still with him.

_Wish I'd never grown up,  
I wish I'd never grown up._

Now, Draco regretted almost everything he'd done. Everything he'd done with his father that is. In the end Draco realized his faults and his wrong turns. If anyone knew, they would probably say something like: "about bloody time," but no one did. Not even his mother, because telling her would have been too late. He had realized what she had tried to do for him, too late. It was because of her he ended up here. It was because of him she didn't. That's why he's singing today. He is singing for everything she was, and for everything he wasn't.

_Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up,  
I could still be little,  
Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up,  
It could still be simple,_

He wished he could do it all over again, but this time, the right way. If he had only known back then that his mother was right all along. She had told him to be careful, to not try to be his father, to be himself. He, of course, didn't listen. Why hadn't he? Just like any other teenage boy didn't listen to his mother when she was being protective. He's like any other teenage boy; they loved their mother dearly, but didn't respect her like they usually respect their father. Draco knew now how wrong he'd been. How foolish he'd been.

_Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little,  
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up,  
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple,  
Won't let nobody hurt you,  
Won't let no one break your heart,  
And even though you want to, please try to never grow up,  
Oh, don't you ever grow up,  
Oh, never grow up, just never grow up._

He realized only now when the song was finished, what his mother had sung; '_I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart , And no one will desert you,'_ That was exactly what she'd done. She had abandoned him in the time he needed her the most. She had hurt him, she had broken his heart, and she had just recently deserted him. For a moment, he got mad at her for lying to him, but it soon wore off when he realized that it was exactly what he had done to her; when he started to be around his father more and more. Draco hid his face in his hands. All was so messed up, he was so lost, and he needed his mummy. He felt hot tears welling up in his eyes for the first time since his mother took her last breath. He sat on his knees now with the guitar beside him as he looked up in the sky. His tears ran down his cheeks, he had no intention to wipe them away, and he didn't care if anyone saw him. He breathed heavily and fast and all of a sudden, he screamed up in the sky at the top of his lungs in agony: "Mum, I'm Sorry!" He broke down in tears for real now and cried and cried and cried, all this while he repeated 'I'm sorry' over and over again in a faith whisper.

_The End

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_**A/N:** I heard this song for the first time Yesterday,  
and I instantly thought of our favorite Slytherin.  
I really hope you liked it. Why don't you tell me in a review eh?_

_I am aware that not many people will read this if it's not a romance fic with someone.  
I'll take my chances. But if you really liked it, Please tell someone about it.  
Thank you. You just got yourself a cookie!  
Review Please! and check out my other stories!_

_Nicco  
xxx  
_


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